Magnicicat

     I was at a meeting for new mothers.  One mother confessed that she was really struggling, and I sat to confess the same.  She said she will fall asleep at night nursing her baby while praying the Rosary.  I, to, understand that prayer in the middle of the night.  This is one which is so over looked.  She teared up and said she didn't realize how hard it would be to mother, and she didn't know what else to do.  My response came from a deep place of knowing:  "Go to Mary, she understands."
     I found a close relationship with Saint Mary when I found out I was pregnant with my fourth child.  Feeling completely overwhelmed, I emailed a Priest friend of mine.  She had told me at a retreat that she would stay up, nursing her sons and play with their hair.  She had called it her time to pray.  She said to remember that Jesus had siblings and Mary must have struggled also.  This helped me see the Blessed Virgin as real.  She was human, just like me.  She faced a great deal at a young age.  She did it all knowing what was at stake.  This was inspiration to me, and I think to many other mothers who feel overwhelmed.
     Every mother's day I struggle.  I struggle with a past, a present and a future.  I struggle with a holiday that was intended to be a peacemaking day, and has turned into a shopping day.  We post things all over facebook about how wonderful and perfect our mothers are.  Yet, we forget how human we are.  I am acutely aware of how human I am.  I am all too aware of the mistakes from my childhood and the problems in my adulthood.  I don't like the commercial place of all things mother.  Yet, this year I received two amazing, and completely unexpected gifts.
     I received a lovely note and present from a teenage friend of the family.  She thanked me for being a mother in her life.  This was humbling for me, and I am so grateful for a young lady being able to express herself that way.  I, truly, am the lucky one.
     I also received words of wisdom from a good friend who understands me and my struggles.  She called just to tell me she understands the 'work' I have done.  She has seen how her mother has worked to break chains of abuse.  She called me to let me know how much she respects her mom, and that my kids will know the same.  She said that my children will rise up and call me blessed.
     These words came from a woman who's integrity I cannot question.  She does not speak things lightly, and she certainly doesn't tell untruths.  I was stunned by her words, and all together grateful.  Every mother should recieve this sort of gift.  For that instant I touched another place with Mary.  Somehow I think she gets this one too.  She calls herself a lowly servant, understanding that this service affects the generations. 
Amen

Magnificat - Luke 1:46-55 (as found in the St. Helena Breviary)

My soul proclaims your greatness, O God;
my spirit rejoices in you, my Savior,
 for you have looked with favor on your lowly servant.

From this day all generations will call me blessed;
 you, the Almighty, have done great things for me,
 and holy is your Name.

You have mercy on those who fear you
 from generation to generation.

You, O God, have shown strength with your arm,
 and scattered the proud in their conceit,

Casting down the mighty from their thrones
 and lifting up the lowly.

You have filled the hungry with good things
 and sent the rich away empty.

You have come to the help of your servant Israel,
 for you have remembered your promise of mercy,

The promise made to our forebears,
 to Abraham, Sarah and their children for ever.