Mentoring

Mentoring has become a real theme for me over the past several years. I listened to a parenting 'expert' talk about relating with children. For the first 2-3 years, the parent's role is a form of ministry. You take full care of your child. Until age 13 or so, your role is to discipline. He referred to this as 'discipleship'. After at 13, the parent's role is mentor.

It was a huge shift for me as I started figuring out how to deal with my almost 13 year old daughter. I also quickly realized that I needed my own mentors.

Being mentored can be difficult. There have been times when I was told things I didn't want to hear. There were times when I wanted it 'my way', and I didn't care what other people thought. I also became aware that, even with a mentor, I was in control of my own decisions. Likewise, I was completely accountable to myself. It was altogether freeing and frightening.

As I have pondered my role in mentoring others, I realize how hard it can be. I had to give up control and let them feel the freedom (and accountability) to making their own decisions. I had to take my needs, my desires and my prejudices out of the equation. I had to make myself available for them.

I watched 'The View' today. All of the co-hosts talked about the mentors in their lives. I recognize the gratitude of knowing that we never, ever really get anywhere in life by ourselves. I was able to Skype with my Spiritual mentor today. I still find it remarkable her generosity with me. I hope, and pray, that I can repay that by helping others.